Before and After

I was dying and you asked me what are you doing here? I really can't articulate how much this hurts. Dying was never this painful. Dying wasn't hard. It's the living I have to do now that feels unbearable.

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Wyoming Winter

I'm just so cold. Somewhere, even now, there is sunlight, but here, there is only ice and snow and darkness. A blanket of white as far as I can see, and biting, howling wind slapping at my face. What have I done? The ground is frozen solid, and I let myself fall backward into powdery … Continue reading Wyoming Winter

You’re asking why the pain is always equal but the joy just never spreads around.

I was thinking about trauma and dangerous situations, like you do, and I also realized that in connection with some of that I’ve been trying to, in a way, reinvent the fucking wheel. A more accurate way to put it would be to say that I’ve been sliding away from a certain set of coping … Continue reading You’re asking why the pain is always equal but the joy just never spreads around.