Why am I like this? (A serious question)

My therapist recommended that I read the book When Things Fall Apart by Pema Chodron. I'm about a quarter of the way through it, and I'm feeling it so far. I don't want to be overly optimistic, but I feel like this book could change my life, if I do the work it suggests. Now I'm … Continue reading Why am I like this? (A serious question)

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You’re asking why the pain is always equal but the joy just never spreads around.

I was thinking about trauma and dangerous situations, like you do, and I also realized that in connection with some of that I’ve been trying to, in a way, reinvent the fucking wheel. A more accurate way to put it would be to say that I’ve been sliding away from a certain set of coping … Continue reading You’re asking why the pain is always equal but the joy just never spreads around.

Here goes nothing.

As I left Wyoming, I did my best to convince myself and everyone else that it didn’t bother me. And I think I was really able to believe this for a while, despite mounting evidence to the contrary. The reason I was able to believe it was because I’d convinced myself that everything would be … Continue reading Here goes nothing.

Disabled nonbinary trans person having a situation

Hey, all. As many of you may be aware, I have bipolar disorder. I also am in recovery from an eating disorder and am dealing with the aftermath of a nasty relapse that landed me in the hospital. In March 2014, I applied for disability benefits, and on September 6 of this year, I will … Continue reading Disabled nonbinary trans person having a situation

Felt that I was in this long, dark tunnel.

(also on tumblr) A natural question, for me, is what sorts of things (if any) are not potential sources or catalysts of PTSD. Virtually anything could become traumatic for a given individual. I might be wrong, but this is how it seems to me. This is how my experiences make it seem. In any case, … Continue reading Felt that I was in this long, dark tunnel.